Mama's Got a Brand New Bag

I used to work at a small, private, liberal arts college in Ohio. The students there were very fashion-forward and dressed up to go to class. It's very different from my current place of employment, where one time, a guy in the front row of the lecture hall sat with his sweatpants around his ankles (yeah, he was wearing shorts underneath, but it was still disturbing), and just last week, a student came to class wearing Sponge Bob Square Pants pajama bottoms and bedroom slippers--and not the kind of bedroom slippers that can pass for shoes, but the really fuzzy ones.

Back when I was at the school in Ohio, I became very confused when I began to see a number of fashionable young women carrying this type of bag:

My first thought was, "What the . .(?)" I predicted that if I were to look inside one of these bags, I would find a plastic rain bonnet, a Medicare card, and a lint-covered Wint-O-Green Lifesaver. But a trip to a "boutique" revealed that these bags were designer bags. They were Vera Bradley bags. And they were très chère. Oh.

Well, Vera Bradley needs to watch her back because there's a new sheriff in Mature-lady-bag Town, and his name is Mr. Banality. While cleaning out my grandmother's house, my mom found a piece of quilted fabric that she thought might make a nice bag. After holding onto this fabric for 10 years or so, she decided to send it to my craft ninja husband to see if he could do anything with it. And could he ever. Check it:

Vera Bradley, you just got OWNED.

My mom is going to love this bag. First, even I have to admit that it's painfully cute. I love Mr. Banality's decisions on color and the mix of the print and solid. [Insert squealing and clapping about here.] But the real reason that my mom will love it is because she adores Mr. Banality. He's like the child she's always wanted, one who shares her interests and treats her with a modicum of respect. Whatever.

Also, like me, my mom gets giddy when people do thoughtful things for her. Finally, her friend has an authentic Vera Bradley bag, and I'm sure that my mom will be beside herself when she gets to show off the Mr. Banality original. Her very tiny rebellious streak will make her thrilled to inform her friend that not only was the bag created from fabric found in an elderly woman's house and a thrift store (and that the small bit of new fabric in the bag is organic), but also that it was handcrafted by her gender-role-defying SON-in-law. *gasp*

So, I have a couple of days off later this week, and I am planning to spend those days basking in Mr. Banality's reflected crafting glory. And figuring out Band-in-a-Box. And maybe grading some papers.